Michelle The Hussy presents SyntheticBliss

I don’t think I’m ever going to be okay.  No matter how long I’ve been clean for, or how many days since my last episode, I always have the persistent thoughts running through my brain and they’re so hard to manage.  I’m sick of smiling and nodding and pretending to be normal when on the inside I’m just screaming and clawing at my skin and thinking that it would be so much easier to go do a bunch of drugs and forget about my whole life.  Like if I could just manage to stay in that little sliver of conciousness between being fucked out of your head and unconcious, I’d be so much better off.  I know the drugs and the eating disorders and the self-harm was just a crutch, but goddamn, I miss that kind of support.