Michelle The Hussy presents SyntheticBliss

Things are changing.

So today, I managed to offend a bunch of people on Twitter because I muted someone who I find to be a judgemental dick. Someone pointed out that I, too, am always mocking the Internet vernacular (guilty. I have a hate-on for <3s and words like “besties” and “tweeps”) which then resulted in a lot of passive aggressive bitching. And normally I’d be upset about this because I can’t stand anyone to be upset with me due to my constant need to please everyone stemming from years of childhood abuse (yay for run-on sentences!). But this time, it just made me laugh. Because I just don’t care anymore. It doesn’t make any difference to me whether I’ve got people cheering or cursing me, because I love myself. Not going to lie, I think I’m pretty badass at life. I’m a damn awesome nurse who loves every disgusting moment and adrenaline rush from what I do. I’ve turned into a pretty lovely woman who is smart as hell, sassy and snarky, and generally pretty awesome. My grandparents and aunt would be so proud of me today, and that makes me smile. And while I’m not the prettiest girl, I can still turn a head or two.

I’ve lived so long feeling that my life wasn’t my own. I’ve been abused, neglected, and fucked over by almost everyone in my life that I lost sight of who I am. I’ve sold my body to feel loved and found solace in chemicals made in someone’s garage just to feel something. So now here I am, almost 26 years old, and I finally feel that the world belongs to me. My life is my own.

So no, I won’t apologize. Or feel upset that there’s some people out there who aren’t loving me. Fuck them, I’m awesome, and I’m the only opinion who matters anymore. My best friends from a lifetime ago have and always will love me, and I have the undying respect of my family. That’s all I need.